For my thesis defense, I wanted to create a new kind of coding for people living with symptoms of post-traumatic stress. Limited to the experiences of soldiers, I didn’t see myself or my experience of disability reflected in what I saw online, in history, or in other sources of media. So for that reason, I made my thesis defense with the goal of creating a more androgynous experience of those symptoms to stray away from previously male-centered representations. So by utilizing the aesthetics of the grotto-esque, and the destruction method of Paul Mccarthy, I was able to reappropriate symbols and memes associated with PTSD. It was also through my collaborative use of video, animation, and sound that I was able to translate the visceral feelings of my symptoms to audiences of all bodies and abilities. Finally, by partially disassociating from my own experience and triggers, I feel I’ve made something almost anyone can approach: A panic attack in a little box. Enjoy.
My name is Leann Vincent Bigelow (she/her/data corrupted), and I’m a queer artist and video maker. Having studied Animated Arts at the Pacific Northwest College of Art, I learned to approach animation and video production with a level of experimentation, and naivety. I particularly enjoy the aesthetics of the grotesque. Which I use to represent my intersectional feelings of queerness, femininity, monstrosity, and disability. Using penetrative animation, what I want most is for my viewers to be confronted by the things they may be accustomed to neglecting.